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Today in ACTS class Mrs. Gillespie was talking about the 4 types of people in life.� The procrastinators, the prioritizers, the slackers and the "yes-men."� at one point or another we all fall into each of these categories.� right now i am being both a slacker and a procrastinator.� i have an 800 word essay to write about the Canterbury Tales, but i have absolutely no motivation or desire to read another rhyming cuplet for the rest of the semester.�

Mrs. Juda handed me back my college essay today and all she wrote on it was, "well done."� iapos;m not sure what i wanted her to say, but those two little words did not ease my fears of the college application process. Maybe if she had said, "well done, this will surely get you into syracuse." or even, "dont bother applying to gettysburg with an essay like this," i might have felt a little better but, "well done," gives me no sense of direction whatsoever.� speaking of direction, everyone keeps asking me what i want to do in college. I have so many answers to this question; i want to learn, to meet new people, to study, to party, to smile, to sleep.� its so hard to answer the question when someone asks you "what do you want to do with the rest of your life?"� as if i could just decide right now who, where and what iapos;ll be in 10 years.� it reminded me of John Mayerapos;s first song, "Real World," where he says, "take your life, plan it out in black and white."�

while we were sorting the Birthright donations today, steph told me that i really need to make up with amy because sheapos;s going to be in spain at the same time as me.� i dont think this is a very good reason to make up with her.� steph also said that amy has a right to be mad at me because i tried to make up with her while i was at�a party. I dont see what difference it makes.� i dont even see why shes mad at me, actually.� Melissa is going to visit her tomorrow and i bet theyre going to the city.� im not jealous that melissa is going and not me but i am jealous theyapos;re going to the city together.� i love nyc in the fall. Last year i visted amy on columbus day weekend and we went into the city and it was so hot out.� i was so nervous stepping out of penn station that i couldnt eat my wrap from au bon pain at all. I had�probably 4 ciggaretts that day beacuse all the business and inconsideration of the city made me so anxious.�

im going to boston this weekend to look at colleges and my mom and i are staying at the intercontinental.� its like a 4 1/2 star hotel and weapos;re staying for one night. My mom was so proud that she got reservations there and told me to look it up online.� i know she only did this because she wanted to impress me.� jon my tennis coach told me that she is trying to be my best friend. Heapos;s pretty much right. She gave me the keys to her 2008 acura TL and i put them on my keychain.� the older i get to more i realize how child-like and insecure my mother is.� she constantly needs someoneapos;s approval and consideration in order to feel important.� She reminds me of my dadapos;s dog, shadow, who constantly waits and begs for praise.� i think my mom is still the girl she was in high school. I saw how fragile she was at my grandmaapos;s funeral when my dad was holding her as she sobbed into his shoulder.� i felt bad for her but it made me sick to see my parents like that when theyapos;ve been divorced for over a year.

i have nothing else to say except that its 2:30 and iapos;ve accomplished nothing except for watching 1/2 of Factory Girl and memorizing two stanzaapos;s of Hugoapos;s, "Demain, des lapos;aube" in French.� Oh, and i gave my essay to mr. Pzrech to read, heapos;ll be much more helpful.
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